Dealing with loss is not something that I am unfamiliar with. Unfortunately, someone who I worked with passed away unexpectedly yesterday afternoon. I had not known him long, but believe me when I say… he left a lasting impact! I am saddened at the unexpected turn of events. I am angry that this is the way his timeline was meant to go. I am hurting for all those who are struggling to handle his passing. Life just isn’t fair, it seems. Those who bring so much light and love into the world seem to the first ones who are called home.
Is the the people that pass or is it the unexpectedness that makes you feel like you have been sucker punched. Not only are you trying to process what has happened, but you are still attempting to move forward in your everyday life. Although I was not considered a close friend or can even pretend that I had the relationship with him as many did, I feel like this tragedy has hit me in a completely different way. My reaction is to sink back into the depression and the hurt that I felt when I expected my own husband unexpected passing. I can relate to all those friends and family of this wonderful person attempting to wrap their head around it all. The lack of closure that exists can really eat away at a person. The thoughts of ” I should have done more” and ” did I miss the clues” are bouncing around in your mind like the ball in the Pong arcade game. I am not talking about the nice slow easy to anticipate ball, but the one that is moving faster than the speed of light and moving erratically. Although the current situation is completely devastating and taking me back down a road I’d rather not experience again… I hope that my own experiences can help others heal.
I wish I had some awesome words and a magical fix to make all the pain and hurt subside, but we all know there is no such thing. One piece of advice I have is to lean on your support group. No matter who small or insignificant it may seem to allow those who love you to help, LET THEM! As much as family hurts at the loss of one of their own, friends can feel the same amount of pain. When we are dealing with grief, I promise no one hurts any worse or less! We are all hurting in different ways. Time does heal all wounds. Sometimes it takes longer that we would like, but the slower the process, the more thorough the healing.
“You’re sudden death has touched our lives and heart dear colleague. They way you have inspired us has touched us even more.” – Unknown